Tag Archive for: healing

Healing Intense Fear and Abandonment

Case 11: Healing Intense Fear and Abandonment

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Carl Jung said, “Healing is about becoming conscious of that which is unconscious.” As we see through our limiting blocks, we become freer. One way to help us awaken is to place full focus and attention on whatever holds us back.

Client Background

Mike (name changed for confidentiality) came in with a “gripping, intense fear of rejection and abandonment” that was dampening the potential of his current relationship, causing misunderstandings, as well as social anxiety. Most intense, negative feelings are the result of old, stuck emotional energy in the body that gets replayed in different circumstances with other people throughout our lives. So, during his session, we allowed these specific fears to show him when they first occurred.

Client Experience

The fears brought us to a scene of Mike as a 5-year old boy in this present life, a common starting age for most issues. His mom and dad played an innocent trick. They pretended to leave the house and go on a family outing while Mike was sitting in a chair backwards with his legs caught in the wooden slats of the chair. While the adult mind can laugh it off in retrospect, the 5-year old child’s brain is not developed enough to process intense emotions, and so he could only feel the panic and fear from the abandonment of his caregivers.

Since this small child was unable to adequately express, articulate, or discharge these emotions from the body, these feelings became stuck energy in his chest and stomach area. Then, through the Law of Attraction (like vibration attracts like vibration), the vibration from this fear-based energy formed repetitive patterns with similar emotions which replayed in various times throughout this life for the next 40+ years.

An unconscious part of us finds and attracts circumstances and people into our lives that replay these stuck emotions in the body, which often relate to one of our soul lessons. However, once the origin of this fear is discovered, the mind can process the information and then release the negative energy from the body, replacing it with one’s own source energy or potential. This healing process lightened Mike’s vibration and heightened his perspective. Then, as he began processing and releasing the stored energy of past trauma, his consciousness spontaneously showed him a different lifetime.

In this one, he had died in a car accident at night, alone on a dark road at the age of 20. This past life death scene related to a lingering sense in this life of being alone and lost, as well as a feeling of impending doom that surfaced within his consciousness every time he drove across the state late at night to visit his parents. It also explained why he had the persistent thought in high school, “I just want to live past 20.” As the origin of these thoughts and feelings entered his awareness, they could be energetically released, which also freed him of perplexing physical ailments on the right side of his body. Once we uncovered the first layer of fears from his childhood, the second layer revealed itself.

Client Results

After the session, Mike wrote this in a review: “My session with Eric was very enlightening. I was able to see the event with a clarity that I never have before. I saw details that I had not remembered before and we were able to go through it step-by-step. I was never afraid or upset, but able to understand and release all the complicated elements of it. I have even been able to talk about it with friends now without fear.

Throughout the next day after my session, I became increasingly aware of a physical change in my body. The center of my chest felt oddly solid. As I thought about it, I realized that for as long as I can remember, I had a hollow trembling in my chest at the base of my sternum. It was only the absence of it that made me aware of how serious it was. I had even gone to see a doctor to have my heart checked, but he said it sounded normal. I’ve had several stressful things happen since and was able to handle them in much more rational ways.”

Eric’s Comments

Although these were two different lifetimes, they were very connected and similar in emotional content. Mike’s feelings of abandonment, rejection and aloneness became much less, and the relationship with his partner improved and became closer and deeper. This is an example of how we can liberate ourselves from the pain and suffering that occurred in the past, bit by bit, layer by layer. Then we can begin to live more easily from our authentic selves which are unclouded by limiting fears.

Relief from Depression and Unwanted Emotions

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Depression and anxiety often go hand in hand, so we work with depression much the same way as with anxiety – by looking at the feeling under the microscope of hypnosis and discovering the subtle, negative thoughts that make up the heavy, stuck feeling of depression. Uncovering these subconscious thoughts and limiting beliefs is the first step in diminishing their power to impact your life. They are nearly always untrue, and belief in these false thoughts gives them their power to affect the way you feel and live your life. Dr. Bruce Lipton wrote a book called The Biology of Belief which demonstrates this. When these false beliefs are fully seen through at a higher and deeper level of consciousness, beyond the conscious and even subconscious mind, we can replace these thoughts with empowering ones that are based in a higher truth from the vantage point of your eternal soul self.

While anxiety involves subconscious thoughts that are often future-focused while based in the past, depression tends to be predominantly past-focused, often including the emotion of anger or resentment. Resentment or anger is often about having to put up with something unwanted, or not getting something that was wanted, such as a sense of being loved, wanted, valued, safe and secure, etc.

Sometimes, depression or anxiety can be passed down unconsciously through the generations, like an “unconscious virus”, in the form of thoughts, feelings and emotional patterns such as the way in which love or anger is expressed or not expressed. As children, we not only depend on our parents for food and shelter, but also for a sense of worth and safety. Sometimes parents of past generations were too absorbed in survival or else their own issues to be fully present with their children or to give their children a sense of being loved, wanted and valued. If these core feelings of value were not felt, a person may feel a subtle sense of unworthiness and the seeds of depression and/or anxiety are sprouted in the belief and emotional system of the person…And if this subconscious emotional energy is never allowed a chance to be “emoted” through us, by being directly articulated or expressed, it can remain as trapped energy in the body/mind system, and years later have a subtle “pressure cooker” effect on the body/mind by negatively affecting the way we view ourselves, thus clouding our experience of ourselves and the world. This is why there’s often plenty of negative subconscious self-talk beneath depression or anxiety, and this is what can unconsciously be passed down through the generations. In the Present Life Emotional Healing session, we can become aware of this passed-down thought-form energy and stop it at the unconscious level, as well as ceremoniously heal the past generations. You release this unbeneficial thought-form energy and replace it with your own source/potential that was lost when you took it in.

Also, we examine all other contributing factors to depression or anxiety, such as the food that is fueling your body. Since there is a food/mood connection, certain foods will contribute to a lighter or more grounded feeling. Exercise is also scientifically proven to help the neurotransmitters fire across the chemical serotonin in your brain.

Case 12: Two Past Lives that Helped Release Her Anxiety

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Client Background

A woman (I’ll call her Beth) came in having struggled with anxiety her whole life. She had panic attacks, feelings of unworthiness, and low self-worth. She wanted to try past life regression to help deal with these feelings and negative beliefs. Past life regression connects you to your higher self which will in turn show you the precise life or lives that can help you move forward in the way that you are requesting. Beth’s higher mind knew exactly what would be most helpful for her.

Client Experience

Beth saw a past life where she grew up in an orphanage where she kept to herself because she never felt like she fit in. She described her past life at age 12 as follows: “The woman who runs it is strict and mean. I don’t like her. I don’t remember my parents, and it feels lonely and sad being there. I don’t like being by the other kids, and I feel like I don’t fit in.” She left the orphanage in her late teens and worked at a tavern, but still kept to herself, never feeling like she belonged. She lived by herself the rest of her life. Then one day in her 50’s, she was out walking when she fell, hit her head, couldn’t get up and she died alone. She felt her soul drifting up into a lighter, higher vibration, and then she began to sense other beings sending her comfort and reassurance. She reported, “it feels like love, purifying energy and peace.” In the soul realm, she reviewed the life she had just left and saw how her low self-esteem and feeling of not wanting to be noticed carried over to her present life. From the vantage point of the soul, she understood her soul lesson in that life could be applicable to her present life. She described her soul lesson as follows: “I shouldn’t close myself off and assume that people don’t like me. I need to be more comfortable with myself and choose who I want to be around.” She then received a download of fully seeing and feeling what it would be like in her past life and current life if she lived from that wisdom.

She was then shown a second life of a high-status man who was a respected leader and in charge of making decisions for a community. He felt comfortable and confident speaking in front of others, with no self-doubts whatsoever. He was adept at fencing and even taught his wife and daughter how to fight with swords. When that life was over, her soul drifted up and at one point noticed that there were others with her that felt very loving. She described one of the presences as either a male spirit guide or an angel. She said, “They’re telling me that I have the ability in my present life to be that confident and self-assured as long as I remember who I am.” She then added, “I can really feel my heart center opening up a lot right now.”

Client Results

Two weeks after her session, Beth reported that her anxiety had become much less, especially when she was around people. She no longer felt the tight anxious feeling in her chest when around new people. She had not experienced any more panic attacks and felt much more confident at work. She also noticed that her intuitive abilities had increased and she was more confident in making decisions. She also reported that her heart center had continued to open up and expand, and she noticed feelings of love more frequently, even to the point of tearing up.

Eric’s Comments

Past life regression works at a very deep, subconscious level. It not only shows you the root of an issue, but also the perspective shift from a higher vantage point that needs to happen to bring healing and resolution to presenting life issues. This perception shift can be felt fully throughout the body, mind and soul, and settles in as a deep knowing that overrides any subconscious fears of “not good enough.” In short, you experience fully the truth that you are a brilliant soul being using a body. As Suzanne Giesemann channeled, “We are here to master being a soul in a human body.”

Case Study: A Lifetime of Anger Released

Case 13: A Lifetime of Anger Released

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A client (I’ll call her Ann) came in with “demons of anger”, in her words. It’s valuable to set an intention prior to doing a past life regression session. Her intention for her past life regression session was to “see a life or lives that can most help me understand and heal my anger about not feeling good enough”.

Ann saw herself in a past life as a boy who never knew his parents and was raised by relatives in a home in which there was care, but not closeness. Home felt cold. As a teenager, he fell deeply in love with a girl at school, but she died of an illness. After graduating from school, he moved to a new town and found a job cleaning. Eventually he married a woman that he didn’t really love, describing the marriage as “a convenient escape from loneliness…there was no love between us and no bonding with the kids.” As he grew older, he worked as a blacksmith in a small town, and felt stress and guilt about not being able to provide more for his family. “My wife and I have nothing to say to each other. After the kids grew up and were out of the house, they don’t visit much, and life feels hopeless and wasted.” He died in his mid- 50’s in a hospital, alone and scared.

He felt regret soon after his death as he reflected upon his life, saying, “I didn’t know who I was, and I didn’t accept the life I had.” He then moved into a shaft of light that pulled his soul into a higher vibration in the spiritual realm. Ann described it in this way: “It’s getting lighter. It feels like waves of energy are taking care of me. I feel calmness, forgiveness and not alone. There’s an energy that makes me feel connected, and a forgiveness for myself. It was a hard life with not enough money or food and I felt stress that whole life. I couldn’t provide as a man because there wasn’t enough. But I also didn’t provide love for my family.”

In the spirit realm, I typically ask, “What you would do differently if you lived that life all over again, only from the higher vantage point of your soul?” Ann responded: “I would have shown my wife and kids love and acceptance.” She then immediately began to feel what her life would feel like if she had actually done that, which is typical in the past life session. “I can now feel how different and much lighter that would feel if I lived from that perspective. I would have taught my kids things and been at weddings, and then enjoyed grandkids.” She described the soul learning in that life to be: “Don’t sweat the small stuff. Appreciate the life around you…the family you do have. Appreciate what you can in life.” She then felt a deep compassion overcome her for people on earth who are hurting.

It became evident that the feelings that were left unresolved in that past life carried over to affect the mental and emotional energy bodies in this present life, thus contributing to the feeling of anger about not feeling good enough. We then released the thought-form energy from the past life that had carried over and replaced it with the wisdom and light of her higher soul self.

Two weeks after the session, Ann shared how her session impacted her. She wrote in an email: “I have noticed a huge change. Driving home after my session, I felt an immediate sense of calmness and comfort. I felt like the empty and questionable pieces of me had a tangible reason. I finally felt free to feel better. I had no idea what to expect from the session and the fact that I was given a glimpse of a past life was riveting…especially the fact that I was a man. The trauma from that life, without parents, gave me such compassion for the life I live right now. My relationship with actual parents may never be repaired, but I have a clear understanding of why I may have been a difficult child for them. My life is forever changed and my anger for not feeling good enough is gone. I have already had success in my personal and business life because of my session. Thank you, Eric! I am truly grateful!” 

This is a good example of how a past life regression session works. A client can discover where the root of a problem or issue lies, release it, and then view both the past life and present life from the higher-dimension vantage point of the soul. Wisdom, clarity and compassion are natural by-products from resting in this high-vibration state of being. It’s a level of consciousness that we all have access to as we go deep within. We ultimately are not separate from it, but it can easily become obscured while living in this human experience. That is, until we can awaken to this higher level of awareness within our own being, and that IS our true permanent self.

Love Image - June 21, 2020 blog

Returning Home to Yourself

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This blog is dedicated to waking up to our true self. Let’s begin with a jarring quote from one of my favorite teachers, Adyashanti, regarding one aspect of the human condition: “The world’s problems are, by and large, human problems – the unavoidable consequence of egoic sleepwalking. If we care to look, all the signs are present to suggest that we are not only sleepwalking, but at times borderline insane as well. In a manner of speaking, we have lost (or at the very least forgotten) our souls, and we try very, very hard not to notice, because we don’t want to see how asleep we are, how desolate our condition really is. So we blindly carry on, driven by forces we do not recognize or understand, or even acknowledge.” Although his message seems bleak, he is actually the bearer of good news.

The good news is that our problems, personal as well as global, can be clear pointers to what no longer works for us, thus the starting point to reclaim our power. And even while we as individuals may be stuck in a limiting pattern, there is also a part of us that remains free from the constraints of our mind programs, and offers a clearer way of perceiving. This internal wisdom is available to us and can offer guidance that is based in a more permanent reality, the soul state, which is motivated from a background of love and safety rather than a background of fear, which is common in the human egoic state. I see examples of this in nearly every session. Here is a case example of the insights that come from this relatively “more true” reality:

A woman (I’ll call her Jane) came for a past life regression to gain clarity on her life purpose and whether or not she should relocate to another state. In her past life regression, she saw herself as a woman in a blissful marriage with children until her husband suddenly died. For a long time after his death, she grieved, overwhelmed with loneliness, while closely guarding her heart from further emotional pain.

During the regression, Jane recognized that she was repeating this same pattern in her present life. But then as the past life unfolded more and she saw her past life personality growing older, a shift happened. She saw herself beginning to pour love into her children and grandchildren, which in turn, came back to her, creating a full, rich life once again. It was important for Jane to see how she could overcome her hurt and loss with love. When the life was over and Jane was steeping in the higher vibration state of the afterlife, she experienced her soul self as a much higher level of consciousness, free of the fear-based, limiting, egoic mind patterns. This is usually the most healing part of the session when insights and wisdom emerge as a result of the larger perspective that comes from tuning into a higher frequency. The eternal part of her was then able to reconnect with the eternal part of her husband in the past life, whose loss had created years of stuck anguish in her previous life. She was then able to fully experience the truth that love transcends all loss.

A week after her session, Jane wrote to me this wisdom: “You know that deep love I described feeling for someone else? I am now feeling it for the beautiful essence that lives in me. My heart feels full, complete, and perfect just the way it is. This morning I felt a deep comfort with the person I truly am and was able to begin experiencing what it is like to BE THAT person inside of this body.  And, I love it.  The answer isn’t “out there” as to where I need to move or what I need to do.  It is being at home in me where ever the path leads.  My fear was that in the regression I would run into a real YUK of a person from another life.  That was only my shame and guilt that is so made up.  The real person in all of us is so beyond the denseness we humans can so easily sink into.

 When I return for another session, it is not so much about going thru past lives as it will be staying in touch with the beautiful love energy I feel for ME. That kind of love will only radiate more of the same in others. Right now, I am so enjoying for the first time having a sense of who I am and it is with deep gratitude for your skillful way of bringing me home to myself. THANK YOU.”

One of the greatest benefits of past life regression is tuning into the permanent self that transcends these lives. You can actually experience this higher dimensional self to be deeply anchored in the present moment and free of the subtle, subconscious thoughts that hold us back in life. It’s a great respite to become rooted in the clarity of your true self, free of fears and feelings of lack. This eternal part of us is always available and lies just beyond our thinking mind. As we become more acquainted with our soul while here on earth, we will begin to awaken from the human condition of “egoic sleepwalking.” I believe this is one of our purposes for being here on this spaceship called earth.

Love Image - June 21, 2020 blog

Times of Change

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We are in eclipse season according to astrologers…June 5, 21, and July 4-5. Eclipses represent beginnings and endings. It’s not uncommon to experience turmoil that proceeds times of change, and that is precisely what we are experiencing now on the planet…with Covid-19, George Floyd’s murder, polarizing political beliefs, etc.

As the consciousness level of the planet raises, it brings to the surface conditioned beliefs and subsequent actions that are not unifying and love based, that are not congruent with a high level of consciousness, both individually and collectively. We are in a time where the duality of 3rd Dimensional thinking (black/white; good/bad; right/wrong) is exposing negative, divisive beliefs and patterns so they can be seen and recognized as no longer working and thus in need of transformation. When Steve Dinan, founder of The Shift Network, recently discussed racism, he stated, “There is simply no way for America or humanity to move forward as a species without transforming racism at the root level. Racist beliefs and policies are directly opposed to seeing each other as sacred beings, worthy of respect. Racist beliefs and policies suppress our collective creativity and our compassion. They reduce our ability, as a species, to learn and grow. They keep us stuck in cycles of oppression that fetter the human spirit.”

These transformative times call for healing…and healing is an inside job that begins with awakening to our multitude of blind spots. For instance, if you’re not a person of color, you may be blind to the deep frustration, challenges and feelings of injustice that comes from living as a minority. White privilege is about having the privilege to not think or worry about the color of your skin when you are walking in a park or stopped for a speeding ticket.

Another significant blind spot is our identity beneath our human earth suit. There will be a time when we all gather as souls and compare what earth life was like in the various races and ethnicities that we chose to experience. Wouldn’t it be interesting and insightful if we could have this conversation while we are incarnate? We could more easily talk about the blatant and subtle injustices and frustrations without it feeling too raw and personal. We could more easily understand others point of view without our own bias filters getting in the way. Unfortunately, much of society is currently unaware of the evidence that we are souls using this body for growth and experiential purposes. But that is also changing. Bit by bit we as a species are beginning to crack out of the shell of ignorance into awareness of our transcendent nature.

We are also in a time where judging others and their beliefs seems to be coming to a head in these politically polarizing times. It’s important for all human beings to make note that you may want to be careful about who you judge because as a soul you may choose to incarnate into the very group of people that you most judge so you can learn understanding, compassion and balance. The goal is for all of us to learn that lesson while we’re here, so that we can live and operate from our true foundation of unity and love rather than our conditioned fears and beliefs that create divisions. Here is a fascinating case study that demonstrates this.

I’ve recently read two beautiful pearls of wisdom that speak to the theme that I’m writing about in this blog. They come from Suzanne Giesemann, a former US naval commander and now medium and channel. Each day, she shares a few sentences of love and insights from teachers from across the veil called Sanaya. I would encourage anyone to sign up for these free daily reminders on her website here.

Here is the first one:

Sanaya says: We ask you to examine your aspen trees. On the surface of one grove you see individual trees of varying sizes and ages, all appearing separate. Underneath what appears to be a surface—the earthly ground—lies a vast web of connections: the root system. What appears to be separate is but a web, connecting what? One living organism. The earthly ground hides this from you, yet the soil through which the living tree passes is vital to its existence.

For now, focus on the web of roots. Could you see yourselves at an energetic level, you would begin to understand why you experience so many connections and synchronicities with those you know and meet. Beneath the surface you are one organism. Think not in terms of the physical bodies. This is where you go astray. Think in terms of subtle energy … of Life Force … that which animates you. Perhaps you might call it “Love,” and you would be correct. All is One. We will continue to use analogies and lessons of love until you finally know what the heart has never forgotten. You are so very loved.

The second one is called Much Appreciated. It offers some deep wisdom and suggestions that would benefit us all:

“I can appreciate that you feel that way.”  Would this not be music to your ears from another if you were to state an opinion?  No matter how the other feels, at least you were heard.  Can you appreciate that each of the seven billion of you sees things just a bit, if not a great deal, differently?  If you can appreciate this, then apply this phrase in your interactions with others and as you read your headlines.  It does not mean you agree.  It does not mean, “You are right,” and it does not mean, “You are wrong.”  It means, “I hear you, and I understand you have a point of view.” How does it feel to be heard?  How does it feel to be appreciated?  This is an excellent step toward oneness, the field out beyond right and wrong and differing points of view.  No right.  No wrong.  Just experience. You are so very loved.

Natalie Fowler, an author, psychic, medium, (and also friend and neighbor), described the past few weeks in an interesting way. She recently wrote: “The last few weeks have felt a little like we are living in a snow globe. But maybe our whole world needed to get shook up so we can settle it back together in a new and better way? Maybe it’s true what they say: Life happens FOR us, not TO us.”

As Eckhart Tolle says, we tend to grow the most personally and spiritually on the heels of tragedy. This means individually and as a society. May we all recognize that we are in the midst of tremendous growth opportunity now, depending on how we respond to challenges during this time. Many blessings to all!

How to Respond in This Moment in Time?

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“We are no doubt at a very critical point in time. Our world hangs in balance, and a very precarious balance it is. Awakening to Reality is no longer a possibility; it is an imperative. We have sailed the ship of delusion about as far as she can carry us.” – Adyashanti, The Way of Liberation

For many people, the Coronavirus has triggered root chakra fears of safety and security from not only this life, but past lives as well. Many of us as souls have either died from plagues and epidemics in past lives or known of people who have, so it’s no wonder people are struggling.

Additionally, the stay at home order can create an environment that brings to the surface conflicts and issues within familial relationships. Any conflicts that arise in relationships always point to something within ourselves that can be healed, or shifted to a new perspective that doesn’t create conflict. The virus serves as an opportunity to point to that which is ready to be changed or healed not only within ourselves but also collectively as a society. I’ve had the pleasure of witnessing this healing in my office. Recently, I’ve seen three clients who have healed tremendous trauma in their lives, and are now in a place where they are noticing an effortless flow of feelings of love, joy and gratitude in their lives. Now that they have released their traumas, they are more easily able to allow their body/mind system to be a clear vessel for their soul to shine through and express itself. If you’re in a tough space with your emotions, know that it’s possible to feel more peace through healing work.

The virus is also pointing out lessons regarding the healing of society and the earth. For example, as the busy pace of everyday life has slowed down, the dolphins have returned to the canals in Venice, Italy. Air pollution and global CO2 levels, contributors to climate change, have been significantly reduced. People are witnessing clear blue skies in areas of China that they haven’t seen in years. People are unified in a common challenge, and it can bring out acts of love, creativity and kindness. A wonderful example of this came last Saturday. I was pulled outside by the melodic sounds of beautiful saxophone music. On our street corner was a young man sharing his amazing musical talents. More and more neighbors were being drawn outside. People passing by stopped to listen and began intermingling with others, albeit 6 feet away. Everyone was soaking in the atmosphere…listening, smiling, laughing, talking, some even dancing. In that moment in time, the young musician had lifted everyone’s spirits and created a unified feeling of bond and connection within the community.

We have purposely incarnated into this 3rd Dimension of duality during this transitional time on earth to challenge ourselves, although challenging ourselves happens to be the purpose of all incarnations. How we respond to these challenges helps to create, define and shape who we are, and can also help determine what comes our way in the future via the law karma and the law of attraction. The awakened sage Eckhart Tolle says that we tend to grow the most personally and spiritually on the heels of our greatest tragedies and challenges. Thus, the Coronavirus provides us the opportunity to decide who and what we choose to be in the face of challenges…to act like a victim or to shine as an inspiration to others.

If we’re racked with fear, there is an invitation to remember that we are actually eternal beings based in love and we can heal any repressed fear that is getting triggered within our body/mind systems so we can allow the love that we are to flow through us. This would also be a perfect time to start a gratitude journal if you are feeling fear. Our vibration raises considerably with thoughts of love, appreciation, gratitude and compassion. And it just so happens that these qualities are a natural by-product as we spiritually awaken to the truth of who and what we are. Energy flows where attention goes.

I often like to share some sources of inspiration and teaching in my blogs. Here are a few:

Gregg Braden is a scientist who bridges science and spirituality. One of the ongoing themes of his research and teaching is that we are interconnected, and our thoughts affect not only our body’s immune system and vitality, but also the well being of the planet. Joining a group meditation to heal the planet does far more than we can know and currently understand for not only ourselves but also our earth home.

Alan Pritz, meditation teacher and author, shares specifically how people can serve as channels for divine healing through scientific prayer in this article.

The Community for Higher Consciousness is a group in the Twin Cities area dedicated to supporting people to be their best selves while transitioning into higher consciousness in order to help themselves and also the planet.

Finally, The Shift Network offers online courses and classes to support the growth and transformation for people on all levels…physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually.

We are all growing and evolving on a soul level whether we’re aware of it or not. But it goes so much more smoothly when we are conscious and deliberate about it.

Many blessings to you!

 

Symptoms of Childhood Emotional Neglect

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I’ve been seeing a lot of clients lately who have grown up with Childhood Emotional Neglect. In these cases, an effective means of helping to heal from the impact of emotional neglect is the Emotional Healing and Awakening session. Sometimes the beliefs of unworthiness or shame that get formed are so deeply rooted in the subconscious mind that it’s difficult to release the grip of them with talk therapy only. But when you first become solidly anchored in your higher soul self, which happens in the Emotional Healing session, it’s much easier to see through, disconnect from, and no longer believe the “sticky” beliefs of shame and unworthiness that seem so embedded in your identity. It becomes apparent that these subtle beliefs are not inherent to your true being, but rather are formed purely because of outside influences, such as caregivers who are so caught in their own issues that they can’t be present with you in the way you needed them to be to form a healthy understanding of your true self.

An author and expert on the subject of Childhood Emotional Neglect is psychologist Jonice Webb. She wrote a brief article about it, and I’m sharing it here. I encourage you to take the questionnaire at the end. Please enjoy:

7 Signs You Grew Up With Childhood Emotional Neglect

Childhood Emotional Neglect is both simple in its definition and powerful in its effects. It happens when your parents fail to respond enough to your emotional needs while they’re raising you.

Emotional Neglect is an invisible, unmemorable childhood experience. Yet unbeknownst to you, it can hang over you like a cloud, coloring your entire adult life.

What makes Childhood Emotional Neglect (CEN) invisible and unmemorable? Several important factors. First, it can happen in otherwise loving, caring families that lack for nothing materially. Second, your parents’ failure to respond is not something that happens to you as a child. Instead, it’s something that fails to happen for you as a child. Our eyes don’t see the things that fail to happen. And so our brains can’t record them.

Decades later, an adult, you sense that something is not right, but you don’t know what it is. You may look at your childhood for answers, but you cannot see the invisible. So you are left to assume that something is innately wrong with you.

“Whatever is wrong, it’s my own fault,” you secretly believe. “I’m different from other people. Something is missing. I’m flawed.”

Yet it’s not your fault. There are answers. And once you understand the problem, you can heal.

7 Signs You Grew Up With Childhood Emotional Neglect

Feelings of emptiness.

Emptiness feels different for different people. For some, it’s an empty feeling in their belly, chest or throat that comes and goes. For others, it’s a numbness.

Fear of being dependent.

It’s one thing to be an independent kind of person. But feeling deeply uncomfortable about depending on anyone is another thing altogether. If you find yourself taking great care to not need help, support or care from others, you may have this fear.

Unrealistic self-appraisal.

Do you find it hard to know what you are capable of? What are your strengths and weaknesses? What do you like? What do you want? What matters to you? Struggling to answer these questions is a sign that you don’t know yourself as well as you should.

No compassion for yourself, plenty for others.

Are you harder on yourself than you would ever be on a friend? Do others talk to you about their problems, but it’s hard for you to share yours?

Guilt, shame, self-directed anger, and blame.

Guilt, shame, anger, and blame; The Fabulous Four, all directed at yourself. Some people have a tendency to go straight to guilt and shame whenever a negative event happens in their lives. Do you feel ashamed of things that most people would never be ashamed of? Like having needs, making mistakes, or having feelings?

Feeling fatally flawed.

This is that deep sense I talked about above. You know that something is wrong in your life, but you can’t pinpoint what it is. “It’s me,” you say to yourself, and you feel that it is true. “I’m not likable,” “I’m different than other people.” “Something is wrong with me.”

Difficulty feeling, identifying, managing and/or expressing emotions.

Do you get tongue-tied when you’re upset? Have a limited vocabulary of emotion words? Often feel confused about why people (including yourself) feel or act the way they do?

Parents who under-notice, undervalue or under-respond to their child’s emotions inadvertently convey a powerful, subliminal message to the child:

Your feelings don’t matter.

To cope as a child, you naturally push your emotions down, to keep them from becoming a “problem” in your childhood home.

Then, as an adult, you are living without enough access to your emotions: your emotions, which should be directing, guiding, informing, connecting and enriching you; your emotions, which should be telling you who matters to you and what matters to you, and why.

And now for the excellent news of the day. It’s not too late for you.

Once you understand the reason for your forever “flaw,” and how it came about, you can heal from your Childhood Emotional Neglect by becoming aware of it and noticing how it affects your life. You can establish a new pipeline to your emotions. You can learn the skills to use them.

You can finally accept that your feelings are real, and they matter. You can finally see that you matter.

You can take on your Childhood Emotional Neglect, and your life will change.

If you have some of the 7 Signs, Take the Childhood Emotional Neglect Questionnaire. It’s free.

To learn much more about how Emotional Neglect gets passed down in families, and how to stop it and heal it see the book, Running On Empty No More: Transform Your Relationships With Your Partner, Your Parents & Your Children.

 

Uncovering and Healing the Roots of Anxiety and Depression

Reading Time: 4 minutes

I recently wrote an article for the Edge Magazine. It’s relevant these days as many people’s subconscious issues are coming to the surface while the consciousness of the planet shifts and raises. This happens for the purpose of releasing what no longer serves you from your body/mind system and integrating the learning of it into the fullness of your being. Freedom calls anything to the surface that is not free. Please enjoy these words:

Anxiety and depression can be physiologically, spiritually and/or mental/emotionally based. But since the body, mind and soul are all interconnected, they overlap. Often anxiety or depression has to do with the past affecting you, and this can be uncovered and healed because you are far more than your past. If we put anxiety and depression under a microscope, we see that it is typically made up of a myriad of negative thoughts, feelings and beliefs that began somewhere in the past, occasionally even a past life. The good news is that although the past can have a strong grip on you, it no longer exists except as a memory, which is a combination of thoughts, feelings and corresponding beliefs that get formed, otherwise known as “thought-form energy”. Yet there is a larger, higher, “more real” part of you that transcends the thought-form energy from the past. When you connect to that part, you can uncover and release the roots of the past that limit you.

Einstein said that you can’t solve a problem at the same level of consciousness that created the problem, but you can at a higher level. Your soul isn’t anxious or depressed — and you are that soul more than you are the ego personality that is anxious and depressed — because one part of you lives on, the other doesn’t. In fact, you couldn’t escape that whole, complete part of you if you tried, it just gets covered up with false beliefs from the human experience. Using hypnotherapy, you can connect to and identify with your wiser soul self that is forever anchored in the here and now, and that part of you can help heal your ego-based body/mind self. You then experience what the Buddha meant when he said the thinking mind is the source of all suffering.

Here are some examples: A woman (I’ll call her Linda) came to me recently feeling very depressed. Underneath her depression were feelings and beliefs of shame, unworthiness, and “not good enough” due to growing up with abuse and neglect. These heavy feelings made life feel as if she was trying to run a marathon with armor on. Using hypnotherapy, she envisioned her consciousness moving up above her body, above and beyond the earth, and into Source energy where she melted into it and felt and compared various qualities of Source such as peace, joy, love and security. This can only be done if you’re not in your thinking mind. From this highest dimension of your being, there is a knowing that nothing in the Universe can harm you, and it is a perfect place to heal the ego part of you that feels stuck.

From this high vantage point, feeling connected to Source, Linda looked down at a timeline of her life — specifically above the 2-month old version of herself. I asked, “Should your infant self, like all infants, ideally be made to feel loved, wanted, valued, safe and secure?” “Is your infant self worthy of love?” The truth is yes, all infants are worthy of love, so it became evident to Linda that unworthiness is not inherent to her being. Shame and unworthiness are messages that feel true, but are not, and Linda could see that she picked up these perspectives early on from her parents. Since it didn’t belong to her, she envisioned and actually felt that heavy thought form energy going back to her parents, who in turn passed it down to where they got it from, their parents, and then down through the generations and into a fire pit to be incinerated into Source energy. She then got back the part of her that was lost when took on the feelings of “not good enough”, feeling the sensations of love, empowerment and joy come back to her. She then sent this energy down to her 5-year old self, Jr. High self, and all the other times that she needed it in her life. Four weeks later, Linda emailed me to say that she felt as if a huge weight had been lifted since the session, and that she had propelled far onto her path of growth and healing.

In another example, a man with high anxiety did a past life regression and saw himself as a young Viking whose beloved grandfather was murdered by a group of three men. He was consumed with anger, hatred and revenge, and he died with this rage. These heavy feelings kept a sliver of his soul consciousness stuck around the earth plane, unable to move up into the higher realms after death. We did a soul retrieval and thus healed and re-integrated this lost soul aspect of himself. Six weeks later he reported that since the session he felt much less anxious, and things which would previously cause him much stress and worry no longer affected him.

It is indeed profound and helpful to connect to a higher part of yourself that already is whole and complete, that you can never really escape from, in order to heal the part of you that feels stuck. Then it becomes clear that happiness is actually a perception shift away.

Going Within to Get Precisely What You Need

Reading Time: 2 minutes

One of the themes of my work is: “As you go within, you get what you need”…especially to the degree that you are wanting, needing and asking for it. This happens because the wiser soul part of you already has what the ego mind personality is looking for. And one could say that it is “more true” that you are that wise soul self more than you are the ego body/mind system, because one aspect of you lives on, the other doesn’t.

I’m sharing a case study that perfectly exemplifies “going within to get what you need”. I changed the client’s name for confidentiality.

Cynthia, a woman nearing 60, had tears in her eyes as we talked about the passing of her mother just prior to her past life regression. “I just need to know if my mom really loved me,” she cried. Although she may have intellectually understood that her mother probably loved her, there were no words that could reassure her at a deeper level because her subconscious mind didn’t fully believe it because of a hurtful growing up experience of feeling rejected and neglected. Fortunately, past life regression connects a person to their Higher Self, and this part of her knew exactly what she needed in the session.

Cynthia saw a past life of a happily married, wealthy woman with several children. “Home feels good…there’s nothing to want for.” But a few years later, her 9-year old daughter suddenly died. She was too grief-stricken to nurture her other children. “It feels like part of me is gone…the other children need me, but I can’t be there all the way. I never got over the loss of my daughter.” In the soul realm she said, “I couldn’t give my children what they needed…the love was there but couldn’t be expressed.” Then the insight began to sink in that Mary’s mother in this life was carrying so much pain from her own past that she couldn’t express the love for her children that had always been there underneath the many stressors of her life.

A week after the session Cynthia wrote, “It’s the most unusual thing, as a result of my past life regression, I know my mother loves me. It always felt that she didn’t love me because I thought she saw something in me that was not lovable, not worthy of love…I was given a gift from my Higher Self. It’s a gift of knowing I was loved by my mom. I was unable to “know” this deep down. “Knowing” is the only word I can think of to use, yet it doesn’t feel like the same knowing as in everyday terms. I am so grateful. This is a gift more valuable than any gift.”

Past life regression is an effective means to help you understand and know beyond a doubt at a deep, core level the truth of your value and worth. It also allows you to become more acutely aware of the love within a family that is always there beneath the hurts, misunderstandings and lack of communication. This is because the process bypasses the intellectual mind and trumps the subconscious mind’s beliefs of unworthiness which are based in life’s hurtful experiences. The process connects you to a higher vibration soul dimension of yourself that not only is based in love, but can also see through the subconscious mind’s programming and conditioning from the earth life.